One thing I'll never tell a guy

A couple months ago I picked on the Christian guys with their side hugs and friend zones, but today I feel the need to pick on the Christian ladies, because apparently I'm nice? I came across this meme (what does meme mean anyway?) on Jon Acuff's Instagram and I couldn't stop laughing. I thought it was great that someone with a bigger following than me was calling out the ladies for this. I don't know how you feel about this or if you have used this line before but I absolutely hate it. I'm calling BS. (Is that appropriate? Probably not. Sorry Grandma) I just feel like this is such an easy way out for girls to get out of relationship without being truthful. I recently had to end things with someone who was not walking down the same path as me but instead you just have to bite the bullet and say what you really think is wrong in the relationship. It's also such a cliche that allows people to throw God under the bus to avoid an uncomfortable situation.


Guys have you ever been told this?

Ladies have you used this line before? If so, we should probably leave this as a rhetorical question for the sake of avoiding an awkward friendship.

He's Just Not That Into You

Why am I watching this movie? I hate this movie. I hate everything that it stands for but yet I get sucked into watching it every time because I can relate to it. I can relate to the over analyzing, the excuse making and worst of all, the insecurity. I can relate to these things because that's what being single in your late twenties does to you. Let me explain.

As women we long for companionship, romance and motherhood. These things are all blessings that get jacked up because we feel pressured to accomplish these things by a certain age. According to society, if you haven't achieved these things straight out of college something is wrong with you. You continue to get asked when are you getting married, and what about having kids? We are constantly being bombarded by our own thoughts and insecurities and we forget about God's timing. Or at least I do.

I forget about this perfect plan God has for my life because I am too busy trying to figure out why I don't have what so-and-so has. My Pinterest wedding board isn't getting any smaller. For every 5 pins on my wedding board I feel like I should buy a cat; which would qualify me for a spot on the TV show Hoarders.

So what do we do when we find out that he's just not that into you? Get over it. Easier said than done of course but what if the guy who's just not that into you isn't the right guy at all? Would you rather temporarily cure your singleness or eternally trust in God's provision for your life? I discovered recently that a temporary fix isn't as satisfying as an eternal Love. Duh.

I'm going to let you in on a little secret that probably only a handful of my friends knew about. I recently dated someone. Gasp. And there is a reason it was a secret, because from day 2 (not day 1, I was still delusional) I knew it wasn't right but my singleness became a bigger focal point than my obedience.

In August and September I casually dated a guy I met whom I referred to as "my hot neighbor" (true story). The thing is, he was indeed hot but that was about it. In two short months I quickly learned a lot about the type of man I'd like to spend the rest of my life with and he just wasn't it. Sounds crazy but it's almost as if God used this fling to reaffirm my patience. I learned that this hot neighbor didn't want kids (yeah I asked, apparently I don't like to waste any time) and that showed me just how important a family would be to me. I also unintentionally became the Biblical leader which I quickly learned why that is only a role for the man in a relationship. I also learned that I never want to marry a man I have to drag to church. All of these things sound like no brainers for a Christian woman, but you'd be surprised just how blurry our vision can get when we start looking at potential relationships from behind a wedding veil.

What I learned is that I am 28 and there is nothing wrong with me. I am not married; I don't have children and I am okay with that. I am okay because I know the plans God has for me are much more promising than a hot neighbor and a few dinner dates. I don't have unrealistic expectations like he must always put the toilet seat down but I have expectations of a Biblical leader who serves his church and others well and that is worth the wait.

Your singleness will not kill you. Like the saying goes- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and that is true. My singleness is not killing me, but instead I am using it to discover what it takes to make a strong marriage work because I'd rather learn now than two months into a marriage when we are arguing over nonsense.

So what do you do when you find out he's just not that into you? You trust in a God who is so into you and wants to bless you in ways you cannot imagine. That is so much better than a flirty text anyway.

"I don't say this out of need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am." -Philippians 4:11

"No one is more pleasurable to be around than a person who has had her cup filled by the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the only one who is never overwhelmed by the depth and length of our need." -Beth Moore

"I am certain that I will see the Lord's goodness in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be courageous and let your heart be strong. Wait for the Lord." -Psalm 27:13-14

"If God always delivered us instantly, we would see His greatness once, but we would soon forget. On the other hand, if He teaches us victory in Christ day by day, we live in the constant awareness of His greatness and sufficiency." -Beth Moore

A new life chapter (pun intended)

So I started writing my book today. And a part of me wishes the process was as casual as the way I make it sound, but the other part of me loves the challenge of applying myself to make this actually happen! Some of you might be thinking "Why now?" and I am here to say- WHY NOT? (actually, only a mere 6 hours ago I was thinking the same thing but that doesn't sound as dramatic.) This past week 3 different people have asked me about my writing process. One asked me what I was waiting for in regards to starting the book writing process. My brother asked me when I was going to quit my job and be a writer (even though it's not that easy, but you get the point). And one person asked me where I saw myself in 10 years and we talked about my "hopefully I have written a book by then" response. This week I learned that there will never be a perfect time for me to start and if I keep putting it off it's just another day I am losing out to fear.

God has a way of speaking to me over and over in the clearest of ways, and sometimes I have a way of not listening and unfortunately I've gotten too good at it. He uses different people to speak to me and then sometimes he outright hollas at me, but I don't blame him because I am hardheaded and sometimes need that loud booming voice to get my attention. Several months ago God spoke to me in the form of a cookie. No, his face didn't appear to me on a cookie. What I mean is I got a fortune in my cookie at P.F. Changs that about blew my mind. God knows I love me some cookies so I am not completely shocked by his mode of communication, but I am shocked by the words that were chosen. If you know me I don't take part in getting my fortune read and things like that but I have no doubt that this was God's way of getting my attention. Out of the three of us at dinner, I picked up the cookie with the fortune that read: "You are a lover of words, someday you should write a book." Well you see that's kinda crazy because the thing is I do want to write a book. I have been wanting to write a book for the past couple years but things like fear and insecurity get in the way and it's easier just not to do it. So to help motivate me, I have framed that fortune and put it on my desk as a way to remind me of what I geniunely feel God is calling me to do. I also added a side note on my computer that reads "Snookie wrote a book" in case I ever doubt my talents and abilites. No offense to Snookie, we just know she's not the type of person you'd typically see writing a book. But if she did it so can I.


Here is the hard part- the subject of the book. I feel like I have had the unfortunate blessing of going through some really crappy situations that helped me see just how awesome God really is. It is no surprise to me that the ideas for my book have been put off for so long because it's the devils way of holding me back. See the topics I want to address are sins that girls keep as secrets. Secrets that are too taboo to talk about so some girls go on struggling with them because they are too embarrassed to talk about it. I am going to be honest with you, I don't want to write about this one bit because I know that you will learn things about me that I would rather you not know. If the way God uses me keeps another girl from getting in the backseat on the first date or from crying herself to sleep at night because she thinks she's not worthy then in the end it really is all worth it. While coaching middle school and high school girls for 5 years I was able to see just how horribly wrong (and I mean that with love) our perception of ourself can be. Our need for acceptance, approval and love can sometimes lead us to act in a way that we will soon regret.

I don't have a title for my book, heck I don't have a publisher or editor but I have a God who is awesome and faithful and if this is my calling then He will see it through. I titled the document on my computer "For Your Glory" because I know there will be times that I don't want to write about certain things but in the end the purpose of my book is for God's glory, not to make myself look better.

One thing I ask from the readers of my blog is for accountability. I have a very strong feeling that this is exactly what I should be doing but I know that it will be hard and maybe somewhat embarrassing. I ask that you would help keep me accountable by asking how the process is coming along.

If you are someone who might be questioning why I am doing this, then this quote is for you. This quote is actually what started it all for me and confirmed exactly what I should be writing about (along with the cookie):

“Sometimes God redeems your story by surrounding you with people who need to hear your past so it doesn't become their future.” -Jon Acuff

Here we go...

Susie Homemaker

I cooked today and no one died. It was a good day. When I say "I cooked" I mean that things got real in the kitchen, so real that I even wore my apron from Anthropolgie. I was not playing around. Lately I have been so bored with the things I eat so I did what any girl would do; I went to Target and bought myself a slow cooker then I headed over to the one-and-only Pinterest to see what was cookin'...literally. I found a recipe that sounded amazing- Honey Apple Pork Tenderloin and I knew I had to make it!

Now I am not turning this into a food blog, because I'm no foodie (as you'll see from my pictures)! I just wanted to share with you a unique, and tasty, recipe that was not only super easy to make but fun too.

Here is a list of ingredients, the best part was it was easy to make 

adjustments to measurements to better fit my slow cooker "for two".

-Pork tenderloin (3-5lb)

-3 apples (depends on the size of your cooker)

-Honey (4 tsp.)

-Cinnamon (3 tsp.)

First things first, go buy yourself an apron
 because it makes the cooking experience more fun!

2. Cut the apple(s) into small thin slices and
line the bottom of the cooker with them and
then sprinkle cinnamon all over.

3. I cut my tenderloin in half to fit in my cooker.
Once you get it down to the size you need,
cut slits on the top of the meat.

4. Drizzle some of the honey into the slits
and then place some apple slices in them.

 5. Place the tenderloin in the slow cooker, and drizzle
the remainder of the honey (or more) all over the
top of the meat. Rest some more apple slices on
top then sprinkle with cinnamon all over.
Cook on low for 7 hours.

6. Enjoy! I paired my pork tenderloin with sweet tea and
cornbread along with a couple veggies.
It was flavorful and filling!!

Let me know if you try it and what other types of food you might have paired it with! Happy fall, y'all!! :)

Damaged Goods and Car Wrecks

Yesterday I got into my 4^th wreck. Shocked? You shouldn’t be. This is my fourth wreck in four years. I could be wrong but I am starting to sense a pattern here. The wreck occurred yesterday on a rainy morning and it is true what they say- people in Austin don’t know how to drive when it is raining. I hit a lady from behind after she swerved in front of me to dodge someone coming into her lane. While I understand trying to avoid hitting someone, can you please not do the same thing to someone else? Geez. I don’t know if you have ever been in a wreck, but there is a moment of stillness right before you hit someone. In that moment all I could think about was how much it was going to suck dealing with the insurance after this- such a long and annoying process. After hitting the woman and seeing her white paint all over the front on my bumper I began to grow frustrated. I was frustrated that something I have worked so hard to keep clean and new was once again damaged and wrecked.

Believe it or not, this accident got me thinking about our own self-worth and Christian image. In our weaker moments some of us like to think we are “damaged goods” when we reflect on the bad choices of our past. Who would want to marry someone like me? Someone who has been scarred damaged and hurt by past relationships. We begin to give up on our Christian walk and think that we are too far-gone for God to restore us. We make the mistake of neglecting the things in our life that keep us new and restored, such as prayer, reading the word and living in community. These things are essential to keeping us running the Race at full speed.

I like to think that God looks at me the way I look at my car. Yes my car has bumps, bruises and scratches from past wreckage but it’s not dead. Despite all of its mishaps, I will continue to get its oil changed, check the tires and go in for a tune up when needed. Just because its physical appearance has changed, I have not given up on it because it is still capable of doing what it was created to do. Much like my Christian walk. I am dirty, messy and complicated but God has not given up on me because I am still capable of doing what He created me to do.

So if your life with Christ hasn’t always been pretty and maybe it’s been scarred with a little bit of door dings along the way; don’t lose faith. God still has a lot of miles left on that Christian walk of yours.

“Create in me a new heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.” –Psalm 50:10-12 (ESV)

Identity Crisis

As a blogger I am having quite the identity crisis. When I started this blog four years ago I didn't think it would be a huge part of something that I wanted to do with my life. It was actually a way for me to write and for you to validate me, if we are being completely honest. But now this whole writing thing, it's what I want to do with my life- YOLO. I also named it Beauty For Ashes because I began writing it after a not-so-great time in my life, but now I find myself wanting to change my blog name. I started brainstorming last night and it didn't take long for me to think of something. Now you might be thinking- why would you want to change your blog name? Well for one, people have a hard time googling this site and there are a ton of Beauty For Ashes pages on Facebook. I want to stand out, and I want to make this blog as easy as possible to find.

I came up with a name last night and your job as the reader is to tell me how awesome it is...or how incredibly dumb it is, either one. If you chose to tell me the latter, just remember you might have to see me face to face one day...and good luck with that. Kidding. Okay, so as many of you know a lot of people call me Trace. It has been a nickname that I've had since I was a little kid...probably a young fetus too. Anyway everyone and their mom, literally, calls me Trace...even this one lady at Starbucks that I don't know very well and I can't remember how I met her. So I came up with the new blog name Traces Of Faith- which would still be along the same lines as beauty for ashes and God's redemptive work in my life. My blog posts will continue to show the traces of faith along this wonderful/awkward/uncomfortable journey that I call my life. The good news is that I will only be sharing this name with a band of men who look nothing like me, so I might be easier to spot. Hopefully.

So what do you think? Have you ever rebranded yourself? I need your input!! :)

Christian Guys, Side Hugs and The Friend Zone

Recently there has been a common theme in the conversations I’ve had with some of my girlfriends in the past several weeks, that theme being boys. Shocker, I know. But it’s the type of conversations we’ve had that really got me thinking. About a month ago I was approached with the opportunity to write about dating, love and lust for a new website in the making (that will be amazing by the way) and when my girlfriends found out about that, the questions began rolling in. Two questions stick out the most - how do I get out of the friend zone and how do I hang out with more guys? Well, if there is one thing I am not- it’s an expert in dating. I am not sure if you’ve noticed but my status on Facebook says Single, (which I’d like to change by the way to say nothing but I know there will be that one person who comments- Oh Traci, who are you in a relationship with? Well…no one. Now wasn’t that awkward.) But moving on, in addition to not being a dating guru, I am also not a stranger to the friend zone. In fact, I am so familiar with the friend zone that I have taken up residency there and you can find me cruising around the neighborhood on the third wheel.

So here I am answering questions over coffee about how to get out of the friend zone and then answering questions over sushi about how to hang out with more guys. I am so diverse. (and I threw coffee and sushi in there just so you could think I was more sophisticated. No shame.) I think I get asked this question because I have a lot of guy friends. Let me emphasize this, I have a lot of guy friends BUT I also have a lot of girl friends. There is nothing more irritating than hearing a girl say, “I am only friends with guys, there is too much drama with girls.” So you don’t have any girlfriends? That’s not sketchy AT ALL. Okay, back to trying to help a girlfriend hang out with more guys. My tip- just ask them to hang out! Things become awkward when you hesitate or get nervous then you send off vibes that you have a crush on the guy when that’s not really the case at all, you admire their friendship. I have guy friends that I go to football games with, play sports with, and heck I even have a guy friend that I ask to go to weddings with me. God has blessed with knowing some incredible men, and I am thankful for their friendship because I learn from them. I don’t think there is anything wrong with having guy friends, as long as boundaries are clear, with not only them but in your own heart as well.

By now I am sure you’re wondering, HOW THE HECK DO I GET OUT OF THE FRIEND ZONE?!?! Well, good question. I think I unintentionally put myself in the friend zone out of fear of rejection. It is easier to be friends with a guy than to say call me maybe? (Thank you Carly Rae Jepsen for supplying me with endless jokes) I also think that Christian guys make it harder for you to see the fine line between friendship and flirting- thank you infamous side hug. Now I am not bashing Christian guys, because HELLO, that is my top requirement, but dang is it hard to read them. They are sweet, nice, Jesus-loving, side-hug-giving, Bible toting, modern day Prince Charmings. Disney has nothing on these boys. But with such a welcoming personality, we find ourselves wondering- does he like me or does he just love Jesus? Oh the age old question. 

Now in a perfect world I would end this post having all the right answers, but the thing is I don’t know. I don’t know how you get out of the friend zone, because the problem is I am in the friend zone. So if you are in the zone with me, let’s do lunch or possibly go see Magic Mike…kidding. But if you are a fun-fearless female, please tell us HOW DO WE ESCAPE THE FRIEND ZONE? Comments are welcome and encouraged, preferably with kind and gentle words.

Signing off from the friend zone,

Traci Lynn

New Writing Opportunities

Well hello there old friends, I see that some of you have been checking out my blog and I apologize that there has been absolutely no new content. Serious blogger fail. I recently read a post over on Donald Miller's blog about how writers need to grow their platform, and that is exactly what I have been doing! I have had a couple writing offers that I am seriously excited about!! I am going to be reviewing tacos at local Austin joints for Taco Pollo. If you aren't familiar with my wonderful city let it be known that Austinites love their tacos! I will also be writing for a new up and coming blog for Christian woman. In addition to that I will be writing a burger review my my friend Colin's blog. Talk about fun!! While I have been building my platform and trying to grow an audience I have neglected the most important part- my own blog.

I feel like sometimes I need to have a long, thought provoking post but in reality I just need to write. Write about my experiences, and in the past couple months I've had a lot of them!! So here is a shift in my postings, some will be fun and witty but some will be just for writing practice. I can't neglect my blog just because not every post is amazing, right?

For those of you who don't know, I started up another blog but the new one is completely different. It's called Simply Sports and it is for women who know nothing about sports but want to understand them without doing all the dirty work. That's where I come in, I provide you with all the news in sports so you are a true sports fan, not one of those bandwagoners! :) So check it out if you get the chance! Remember it is just starting out but I'd love your feedback and for you to follow the site!

Talk you guys real soon!!

Open letter to the Class of 2012

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

Congratulations seniors of 2012, you will now get to see this verse printed on every graduation gift imaginable. For me, I received this on a picture frame ten years ago, for you it might be printed on a t-shirt of a cute cuddly teddy bear, or how about a paperweight? Seriously, what freshman in college uses a paperweight? If you do and I just offended you, feel free to throw it at me. I strongly believe that this verse alone keeps LifeWay Christian bookstore afloat. Now before I sound like a blasphemous, self-proclaimed lover of Jesus, let's make it clear that I have nothing against this verse. I love this verse, and I love the context of which it is used in the Bible. What I hate is how the 17-year-old version of myself completely jacked up this verse to justify thinking I deserved everything I wanted in life.

In 2002, I emerged from my sheltered bubble I call private school, in other words- I graduated. I had big plans to attend Texas Tech University (Guns up!) and be involved in sports medicine. I had a foolproof plan and it only involved staying in school for four years. How hard could it be? After all, this was apart of God's plan to give me hope and a future. How can I have a future if I don't graduate college in four years? The thing is, I thought I knew what God's plan was but really it was just my plan and I made it sound like it was all his idea because it is what I told him what would happen when I prayed. (Stinkin' little brat I was!) Well for reasons beyond my control I was not able to finish school and I had to move back to Austin. Talk about a let down. I was confused. I thought God wasn't going to give me anything that would harm me; I had it on a picture frame for crying out loud! I was hurt, confused and probably annoying to everyone around me. Why was this happening to ME? Why did I have to tell the embarrassing news to all my friends? Why did I have to deal with this financial mess? I'm a good Christian after all.

"...then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you." -Jeremiah 29:12

As time went on I began to grow bitter and depressed. All my friends were away at school and here I was throwing myself a pity party on the daily. I was living on my own and struggling a lot, and I started searching for things to find my worth in. Jeremiah 29:11 became a verse in which I used to argue against God- "You said you wouldn't harm me…you said you would give me plans to prosper me...this is not prospering!!" As time went on my church attendance was seriously lacking. I didn't want to be apart of the church college group because I wasn't technically in college and I got tired of being asked why I wasn't in school. I began searching for my self-worth in boys. (Dun, dun, dun) I just wanted someone to tell me I was good enough and to make me feel special. I began looking for approval from everyone, which was another one of my foolproof plans (sarcasm, of course). After years unfulfilling approval of man, I hit the bottom of what I like to call my pit.

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." -Jeremiah 29:13

From 2003-2007 I was a hot mess, a crazy lady if you will. For four years I was constantly searching for something or someone to make me feel validated and/or important. Serious fail. My constant searching turned into constant sadness. I was never happy, and it was because I wasn't looking in the one place I needed to be looking- God's word. I can't remember how I heard of it but I began reading a book by Beth Moore called Get Out Of That Pit. It is an amazing book and I recommend it for anyone struggling with approval idols and becoming a slave to your sin. This book, a long with the Bible began to transform my thoughts, which in turn began to transform my actions. I couldn't get enough of this new Jesus I found. I began seeing all the crappy situations I put myself in as huge blessings. Without Jesus, how can one look back on a relationship in which they were cheated on and be thankful for it because it brought me back to Christ? I started seeking God and I found a new version of him. I parted ways with the god of religion, rules and punishments and I was welcomed into a relationship with the God of the gospel, grace and freedom.

"I will be found by you," declares the Lord "and will bring you back from captivity..." -Jeremiah 29:14

If you would have told me ten years ago that nothing would have gone the way I was planning I would have hated you. Sorry, Christians can't hate...let's say I would have strongly disliked you and then shook my fist at you. I wouldn't have believed you, after all when you are a senior in high school you are on top of the world and the plans you have are indestructible (more sarcasm, imagine that). It took ten years for me to learn that God's plans for my life are the best ones imaginable. If God never took me out of my comfort zone I would have never discovered that I want to be a writer, I would have nothing to write about and I would not be doing what I believe my true calling from God is. God brought me back from the captivity I placed myself in. It was a long hard battle, but I am finally at peace with all the different life changes that I went through. I can finally say- Jesus, I trust you.

So graduating class of 2012, with your big day quickly approaching the only thing I can tell you is this- don't make Jeremiah 29:11 about you; make it about Jesus. Make it about the gospel and make it so that you are surrendering to the different life changes that may come your way. Pray that in your life Christ would be glorified, because when Christ is glorified is when you start living a life that is prosperous and full of hope.

Congratulations Class of 2012, YOU DID IT!! (Bet you didn't see that Legally Blonde reference coming, did you?)

Now Accepting Donations

Raise your hand if you have an iPad.
Well if you were here you would see that my hand is not raised. I've always wanted an iPad but could never really find a use for it in my life. That was until I started finding conferences I wanted to register for. Seriously, nothing says "I go to conferences" like an iPad. I thought I'd share some of the awesome conferences coming up and if you want to join me, feel free to holla.

Verge: Missional Community Conference (February 28-March 2, 2012) in Austin, TX

Killer Tribes Conference (March 31, 2012) in Nashville, TN
*My goodness, I have seriously debated about taking a road trip, this sounds amazing!*

Catalyst (May 9-11, 2012) in Dallas, TX

Living Proof Live with Beth Moore (July 13-14, 2012) in Cedar Park, TX

Looks like I'm going to have to get me one of them there fancy iPad machines, yeehaw!

How To Not Hate Valentine's Day

This is a story of how I snagged not one but five dates for Valentine’s Day. Don’t worry, I will share my tips for success and you too can be looking forward to February 14^th with the rest of us. Move over Millionaire Matchmaker, I got this.

So before you get all excited, or call me a playa (which I am not, I just crush a lot. Shout out to Fat Joe), you should know that I am related to all my dates. No, this isn’t some crazy story of backwoods country folk who marry their relatives (I just offended someone, I’m sure of it). Every Valentine’s Day my family goes out to dinner, exchange gifts and just enjoy each other’s company. I didn’t realize until recently how something so simple was so foreign to some people. I shall explain.

While at work I recently declared that I love Valentine’s day, which was quickly followed up with a coworkers response of: “Oh Traci, I didn’t know you had a boyfriend”…I don’t, and apparently everyone is in the know about it, thanks social media! I felt I needed to explain why I love a holiday that is despised by so many single people, and when I said it was because my family celebrates it together the response was met with unfamiliar gazes. That got me thinking, every year all the single ladies (you’re singing Beyonce now, aren’t you) brainstorm ideas on ways they can completely ignore the day, and some of those ideas involve chocolate ice cream and voodoo dolls. Women will confess that they hate men and the holiday is stupid. Girl please, we know you don’t hate men because come February 15^th you will be back to Facebook stalking your current crush. (I do not speak from experience; all of these thoughts and ideas come from extensive research.) I feel like Valentine’s Day brings out the worst insecurities in us. For some people it reminds them that they have been single for way too long and for others it brings back memories of relationships gone wrong. So get out of that Valentine’s Day rut by celebrating the people you love in your life, not by dwelling on the fact that your ring finger has been feeling a little cold lately.

So as a single lady or gentleman, embrace the idea and get creative. Make Valentine’s Day something you look forward to. Ladies, have a girl’s night that doesn’t involve a fire pit of ex-boyfriend photos, and find comfort in the fact that you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Men, gather your guy friends to watch a basketball game and spit or slap each others butts, you know, whatever y’all do when you’re together (I’m not judging). If you don’t have friends, which you should because that would be sad, be the first in your family to start the tradition of celebrating with each other. Gifts aren’t necessary but spending quality time together is. Get dressed up, make reservations and be an example to everyone out there that a day of celebrating love isn’t confined to a relationship or marriage.

Happy Valentine's Day!!