I will praise You in this storm and I will lift my hands.

An interesting thing just happened, I was googling pictures of thunder storms to add as a visual to this blog and I found something I wasn't expecting. First let me explain why I wanted a picture of a storm. This week has felt like my family has been placed in the middle of a storm, we received some unexpected news that my grandpa is sick and several tests and possible surgeries are being conducted. The hardest part is that he is in Georgia and we can't be there for him on a daily basis. When something like this happens, I do believe God is at work, but it is just hard to wait and see what He is up to. Ok, like I was saying, I just found the most amazing picture, here it is:
(This is a picture of a lion right before a storm.)

I love the way C.S. Lewis portrays God as Aslan in The Chronicles of Narnia, such a strong and mighty character! This photo makes me think of Him protecting me from this storm. It makes me feel like He is enduring all the strong winds so that I might find peace in His presence. What a wonderful God to serve! One that is so selfless, strong and mighty!! I am not going to lie, this sucks and it's hard but I have to constantly remind myself that God never fails and His plan is perfect, even when it's not what we want. So prayers are much appreciated and I can't thank you enough for them! :)

"I believe You're my Healer, I believe You are all I need. I believe You're my Portion, I believe You're more than enough for me, Jesus You're all I need."

I should not operate heavy machinery.

I did about the dumbest thing ever on Sunday night. I was driving down Mopac, going about 75 or 80, give or take a couple mph, and I was touching up my makeup on the way to my friends. I dropped my lip gloss and it landed under my passenger seat. So while I was driving I wanted to see if I could get it out from underneath...I failed. I got my arm stuck. So I began to panic, here I was driving down the highway, could barely see over the wheel and my arm was stuck! Go ahead, shake your head and laugh, I now realize that it was unsafe and incredibly stupid. Well in a panic I pulled my arm out as hard/fast as I could. I took off some skin and my arm has a huge bruise and is swollen. Geez I am special!

Here is a pic, can't see it too well, the swelling has gone down and the bruising is finally fading.
It still amazes me that the one time I was doing nothing while driving is the time I get in my huge wreck. I am thankful that God wants to keep me alive!

"I'm good God, but thanks anyway..."

Have you ever sat through a sermon that just convicts the crap out of you? Well if not podcast Austin Stone's sermon for this past Sunday and then answer that question again. We are focusing on a two week series called "And you are healed." Sounds amazing right? Everyone wants to be healed, but it is the process of getting there that makes me cringe! Matt spoke of a verse in James 5:16 that went a little something like this:
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."
So....God wants me to confess my sins to other people, huh? Even all the dirty details that makes me look like a fake? I don't know about that. Through out the sermon God was speaking to me, actually it was more like he was standing in my face with a megaphone saying "Listen up girl, this is for you!!" Well I heard him, loud and clear, but I get scared when God speaks to me like that. I get scared because I know that when God speaks to me that clearly he means business, he is ready to wreck shop! He was telling me that the sin that I have been dealing with for the past several years needs to come to light and peace out. I like the sound of that, after all who wants to be burdened daily in their walk, but I don't know about telling other people about it. That scares me, to have someone look at me differently and know the real me. God knows the real me, and he still loves me but why am I scared to tell others. I cry out to my Savior often, but why can't I tell someone one little secret? Is my pride more important to me than the sin that is manifesting itself in my heart. Honestly, that seems to be the case. I wish I could tell God "No thank you." but he just keeps reminding me to confess. He reminds me through songs, sermons, and a variety of different things and I know he won't stop until I do what he asks.
I am pulling a Jonah right now, I am running the other way but I wonder what will be the big fish in my life that consumes me and makes me confess. I wish I could do it, I know that I am strong enough in Christ to do it...but I am just too scared to act on it.

So here I am, consumed with the struggle to just spit the words out.
I'm gonna do it...I have to.

Lake Travis Weekend!

This weekend I went out on Lake Travis with my small group from church, boy do I enjoy hanging out with them! We planned a trip out to a lake house for fun but who would have thought it would be a trip to overcome so many fears! Let me explain one of them...
I am not a big fan of water activities, it's not because I don't know how to swim it's because I have been traumatized! When I was about 5 or 6 years old I wasn't the Olympic swimmer of the kiddie pool, I was still hanging on to the sides but one day I decided to take a big tube out to the middle of the 7ft end. Needless to say I slipped through the inner tube and almost drowned. My dad had to jump in and save me...thankfully my sister noticed I was gone because no one else did! Even though he saved my life the first time, I blame my dad for this second traumatic experience. When I was about 7 or 8 (like how he gave me only a year to get over my almost drowning incident.) I went to Schlitterbahn with my dad, sister and other family members, I didn't want to ride any of the rides because I was a big wuss but I had to go on every single one because no one would stay and watch me. (Thanks for the love family!) Needless to say I was terrified and probably wet my suit, who knows since I was covered in water the whole time. I don't like anything to do with fast movements in water...plain and simple. So what did I do this weekend, I went out on the lake and conquered some fears! I like the lake though, it is like the Cadillac of water activities, second to the ocean of course. I think the lake is way classier than Schlitterbahn. Schlitterbahn makes me think of diseases, used band-aids and urinary tract infections, lovely I know...but it does. I am not a fan of a bunch of wet people walking around, eating, and carrying on with life as if being soggy and your skin pruning is no big deal. Bleh.

I am thankful that God has given me this group because instead of pointing and laughing at me, they really helped me get over the whole water activity thing. Allison, being the kind person that she is, was very patient in teaching me how to drive a jet ski. I may have started out going 10 mph but by the end of the end I was going 40, jumping waves and making fast turns. She is my guardian water angel.

Another fear of mine: heights. It scares me so much I don't even like to see people leaning over the side of railings, I freak out and close my eyes. God blessed me with the courage of a chihuahua, it's just something I have learned to accept. But this weekend I had no choice but to conquer that fear if I wanted to get down to the boat dock. Our friends house sat on top of a very tall hill and the only way down to the lake was by a steep tram and walking down steep steps. I will attach pictures so you will grasp the whole experience and see just how scary it was. I must admit, I did crawl back up the steps so I am still working on it...baby steps.

Photots for your viewing pleasure: