So I started writing my book today. And a part of me wishes the process was as casual as the way I make it sound, but the other part of me loves the challenge of applying myself to make this actually happen! Some of you might be thinking "Why now?" and I am here to say- WHY NOT? (actually, only a mere 6 hours ago I was thinking the same thing but that doesn't sound as dramatic.) This past week 3 different people have asked me about my writing process. One asked me what I was waiting for in regards to starting the book writing process. My brother asked me when I was going to quit my job and be a writer (even though it's not that easy, but you get the point). And one person asked me where I saw myself in 10 years and we talked about my "hopefully I have written a book by then" response. This week I learned that there will never be a perfect time for me to start and if I keep putting it off it's just another day I am losing out to fear.
God has a way of speaking to me over and over in the clearest of ways, and sometimes I have a way of not listening and unfortunately I've gotten too good at it. He uses different people to speak to me and then sometimes he outright hollas at me, but I don't blame him because I am hardheaded and sometimes need that loud booming voice to get my attention. Several months ago God spoke to me in the form of a cookie. No, his face didn't appear to me on a cookie. What I mean is I got a fortune in my cookie at P.F. Changs that about blew my mind. God knows I love me some cookies so I am not completely shocked by his mode of communication, but I am shocked by the words that were chosen. If you know me I don't take part in getting my fortune read and things like that but I have no doubt that this was God's way of getting my attention. Out of the three of us at dinner, I picked up the cookie with the fortune that read: "You are a lover of words, someday you should write a book." Well you see that's kinda crazy because the thing is I do want to write a book. I have been wanting to write a book for the past couple years but things like fear and insecurity get in the way and it's easier just not to do it. So to help motivate me, I have framed that fortune and put it on my desk as a way to remind me of what I geniunely feel God is calling me to do. I also added a side note on my computer that reads "Snookie wrote a book" in case I ever doubt my talents and abilites. No offense to Snookie, we just know she's not the type of person you'd typically see writing a book. But if she did it so can I.
Here is the hard part- the subject of the book. I feel like I have had the unfortunate blessing of going through some really crappy situations that helped me see just how awesome God really is. It is no surprise to me that the ideas for my book have been put off for so long because it's the devils way of holding me back. See the topics I want to address are sins that girls keep as secrets. Secrets that are too taboo to talk about so some girls go on struggling with them because they are too embarrassed to talk about it. I am going to be honest with you, I don't want to write about this one bit because I know that you will learn things about me that I would rather you not know. If the way God uses me keeps another girl from getting in the backseat on the first date or from crying herself to sleep at night because she thinks she's not worthy then in the end it really is all worth it. While coaching middle school and high school girls for 5 years I was able to see just how horribly wrong (and I mean that with love) our perception of ourself can be. Our need for acceptance, approval and love can sometimes lead us to act in a way that we will soon regret.
I don't have a title for my book, heck I don't have a publisher or editor but I have a God who is awesome and faithful and if this is my calling then He will see it through. I titled the document on my computer "For Your Glory" because I know there will be times that I don't want to write about certain things but in the end the purpose of my book is for God's glory, not to make myself look better.
One thing I ask from the readers of my blog is for accountability. I have a very strong feeling that this is exactly what I should be doing but I know that it will be hard and maybe somewhat embarrassing. I ask that you would help keep me accountable by asking how the process is coming along.
If you are someone who might be questioning why I am doing this, then this quote is for you. This quote is actually what started it all for me and confirmed exactly what I should be writing about (along with the cookie):
“Sometimes God redeems your story by surrounding you with people who need to hear your past so it doesn't become their future.” -Jon Acuff
Here we go...
