Saturday, December 31, 2011
11 Things That Made 2011 Unique
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Testing. Testing.
Okay, be back soon. I hope.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Wannabe.
I want to be a writer.
I bet you're thinking, "now that wasn't so bad now was it?" Well, yes actually it was. You might also be thinking, "what is stopping you from doing it?" Well, you are. You are stopping me. No offense, if you are reading this the chances of me liking you are highly likely, which also means I care about your opinion of me. What if I fail? What if I'm not as witty as I think I am (insert narcissism here) and well, what if I don't glorify God like I want to?
So since you guys are the ones stopping me from doing this (I hope you sense the sarcasm by now, and if not, have we met yet?) here is how you can help me: Keep me accountable. Next time you see me ask me how my writing is coming along, because chances are I haven't published it and it is just sitting in a file keeping my MacBook company. I am asking you to help me, keep me accountable and help me live a life worthy of the calling I have received.
Thank you for even reading this, you have no idea how excited I get to even see one comment notification in my email inbox.
So don't be afraid to holla, yes I said holla...so much for a serious post.
-Traci
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Christian Lockout
Saturday, July 9, 2011
And You Will Be Healed...
Every time I hear the word confession, I can’t help but think of the song by Usher. You know the one; “These are my confessions, just when I said all I could say…” Well, we will stop there because now you probably just think I'm weird…but you get my point.
If there is one thing in my Christian walk that has literally put the fear of God in me, it has been the idea of confession. The act of bringing my sin into the light and confessing to those who walk with me in Christ the horrible things I struggle with. The thought of doing that has made me anxious and uncomfortable. Let others know what a crappy person I am actually capable of being? No thank you, I prefer to continue to wear this mask that I have so carefully hand crafted. I haven’t out grown it yet, 17 years going strong and that mask has never done me wrong. (Unintentional rhyming. My skills are just that mad.) I would rather not take it off, but thanks anyway God, maybe we can find another way to work on me. How about serving? Yeah, serving, I will just fill my schedule with selflessly serving others. Who needs to confess when I can just serve the heck out of the city of Austin? Sadly, this has been my mindset; fill my Christian life with other acts of obedience, hoping that God would let this one slide.
To give you an example of just how long I have been intentionally putting this off, I have linked a blog post I wrote back in August of 2009, almost two years ago, about the heaviness I felt after hearing a sermon on confession. That’s how long I have let this feeling of uneasiness and anxiousness marinate itself into the very being of my heart. For two years I have felt burdened, paranoid, and not good enough. Every time I was faced with the opportunity to serve, become a leader in some way or give biblical related advice I heard the same words echoing in my mind: “You aren’t good enough.” And sadly, I had believed them every time. To live a perfect life, to walk a perfect Christian walk is impossible, we all know this but to strive to be like Christ is not impossible but it was that voice that kept me from doing so. For two years I allowed myself to be crippled by the fear of judgment and acceptance.
Well two years later and one unexpected night at my Missional Community, it all came spewing out. It was the Thursday after our amazing Easter service. The spirit was moving in our conversations and it was time for prayer requests. As we went around the room, I could hear God telling me to confess. Confess the things that had been eating away at me, even though I hadn’t done them in awhile; confess my past and present struggles so that I may protect my future. I fought Him over it. With each passing person I felt it coming up, kind of like when you have to burp and you can just feel it coming, it was very similar to that. I didn’t want to do it, I made a mental list of all the requests I could make, and if I just stuck to the list it wouldn’t come out. Fool proof. Yeah right, God is the maker of my lips and vocal cords so those suckers didn’t stand a chance. Well it was my turn, and I couldn’t hide it, want to know why? Because I started crying and I couldn’t just sit there and say nothing, so I let it all out. I expressed my faults, fears and guilt. Needless to say it was received very well and it sparked an even more amazing conversation of encouragement and accountability. I always knew that God had provided me with an awesome Missional Community and this experience just reinforces that feeling.
I am sure at this point you really want to know what my confessions were, and I regret to inform you that I will not be revealing them…yet. The purpose of this blog post was not to leave you hanging or prove my holiness. I just wanted to help share with you the freedom you find in confessing. After two years of doubt, I have experienced what God is talking about: “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” I have always wanted to bring my sins to the light and experience accountability and a free conscious but I couldn’t stop judging myself so I had to get over that first. I once heard somewhere if you don’t bring your sins to the light, God eventually will. That he did, and just like the gracious God that he is he provided me with an amazing support group. Take it from me, the thought of confession may cause you to become anxious and nervous. For years I knew those feelings all too well, but the feeling of freedom outweighs anything else. Freedom in Christ’s forgiveness and grace trumps any other form or regret and uneasiness. I took my time and prayed to God whom he wanted me to confess to, and honestly I also prayed that the time to do so would never come but it did and he proved to be faithful. We serve a very faithful God, so don't be like me, trust him when he's says that you will be healed.
"Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy." -Proverbs 28:13
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
My Missional Community Ladies
Monday, May 9, 2011
Beauty For Ashes, Indeed
A little over a month ago my family lost my Grandpa to pancreatic cancer. He had been battling with it for almost two years. I can’t even begin to tell you how strong he was throughout the process. His strength on his deathbed came from singing hymns and having Bible studies with his family. That is just a small glimpse of how big his faith was. Losing my Grandpa is one of the hardest things I have gone through. He wasn’t just a “Grandpa” to his Grandkids, he was my brother’s best friend, my cousin’s number one fan and he was my biggest influence. It was hard to look at his life and not be encouraged or inspired. My Grandpa would be the first to say he wasn’t perfect, the first to take the attention off himself, but he would also be the first to step up and be a servant leader and actually live out the words of Ephesians 4:1 “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.” I think their Pastor said it best at his memorial service when he said: “He went to a better place, but because of Howell Cobb, the place he left is better.” And it’s true, that small town in Georgia gathered together to celebrate and reflect on the life of an amazing man. The church was filled wall to wall, there were tears and laughter, Grandchildren gave speeches and in the end we saw that God was indeed glorified through the life and death of Howell Cobb.
As you can imagine, mourning the loss of someone that selfless was hard. We all had our days, and we still do, but if there is one thing that I took away from that week in Georgia it was encouragement. Encouragement to live my life worthy of the calling I have received. Encouragement to know that when I am tired, weak and weary God is still planting seeds because He is not tired, weak or weary. The seeds God planted throughout the life of my Grandpa were represented in that church, through the hundreds of greeting cards my Grandma received, and through the love and generousity that was poured out to us all week through their friends. My Georgia grandparents have always been a couple that I have looked up to, their marriage, though not perfect, is something that I think all their grandchildren will always strive towards having.
This update is small. Won’t take up too much space. But it is quite the big life changing event. I AM MOVING!! Yup, as of this Friday I will be a single girl in the city. Well, I’ve always lived in “the city”, North Austin to be exact but as of this week I will be about four minutes away from Downtown. I am experiencing every sort of emotion you could come to expect from a twenty-something single lady. I am nervous because I have never lived alone, but I am also excited to make this place my own and decorate it the way I want it. I am excited to frequent all the local Austin eateries and hope to put my GoLocal card to good use. Seriously, I think there are five cool little Austin joints within walking distance from my new place. Even though all these things are fun and awesome, most of all I can’t wait to use this apartment as a place of community and fellowship. When looking for an apartment I prayed that God would put me in a location that I would be used for His glory. Needless to say I am very excited to see what He has in store for me this coming year.
After much thought I have decided to make this last update a separate post. I feel like it has been such an important topic in my life the past two years that I don’t want to minimize the details just make it fit into a couple paragraphs. This is something I have struggled with, something I have ignored and something I have dreaded. But in the past couple of weeks I have seen exactly what bringing sin into the light feels like, and I have experienced undeserving Grace and it is just too good not to share. So the next post will focus on confession.
In the mean time, to be continued…
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Guest Post: Domestique by Steve Bitter
Because of a bad knee and a sensitive lower back, I took up cycling about a year ago. I figured being hunched over a bike for an hour was better for my body than the constant pounding and jarring of the pavement. I knew I would face some of the same physical and mental challenges as I would have on a nice long run. That’s actually what made it exciting for me. All the same life centered themes still applied – Patience, diligence, enduring to the end, etc.
The more I rode my bike, the more I became interested in the professional sport of cycling. I’ve always been a big Lance Armstrong fan, but I started to keep up on other athletes and professional teams on the pro circuit. The more I learned about the riders and team, the more I learned about the sport itself, the tactics and the strategies.
Just like any other professional team, there are specific positions and roles on a cycling team. There are climbing specialists that set the pace on long sustained inclines, and specialize in “attacking”, or creating a gap between opposing riders. Time trialists are the speed specialists. During time trial stages of a race, they do a lot to lower the overall team time. Sprinters are your end-of-stage specialists. Their job is to be in the mix until the very end, and then hash it out in the last several hundred yards. They go after points for winning, not necessarily with time in mind. Then you have the famed “all-rounder”, the team captain, the team lead. This is your Lance Armstrong rider. Proficient in all aspects of riding. The face of the team. All the other roles are designed to support the captain and help him earn the overall victory.
There is one aspect of a professional cycling team that sticks out to me the most and continually fills my thoughts on long grueling days. He is the Domestique. He is the ultimate role player.
The domestique (domes-STEEK) works for the benefit of the entire team. He sacrifices personal fame and achievement for that of his teammates. He will drop back to the manager’s vehicle to fetch additional food and water to bring back to the rest of the team. Often times he will lead his teammates through certain points of the race, allowing his teammates to draft behind him. This eliminates wind drag for his teammates, and well as protects him from being boxed out of a desirable position in the group. Domestiques launch “attacks” on opposing riders, causing them to burn energy to give chase. And “counter attacks”, helping his own bridge the gap to the leaders. If a mechanical malfunction should occur to the captain, the domestique will wait until the issue is resolved, and then draft the captain behind him back to the lead group with the use of as little energy as possible from the captain. Great domestiques make great riders. They make winners.
I’m a pretty avid sports fan, and I can’t think of any role position on any other team, in any other sport, that sacrifices oneself for the benefit of the team as the domestique does for its riders. As a Christian, I naturally compare the world around me to my understanding of Christian principles and doctrine, even if it involves sports and competition.
As my understanding of the domestique has grown, so has my appreciation for the role that Jesus Christ plays in the lives of society as a whole and us individually. When our circumstances are too much for us to bear, or when we’ve asked in faith, Christ is available to each and every one of us to block the heavy winds, provide nourishment and pace us back to where we belong. He does not seek praise or riches or attention. His entire purpose is to get us across the finish line.
After Jesus had spent the day teaching on the shores of Galilee he summoned his apostles to cross over to the other side with him. During their seemingly short trip, a great storm arose and soon threatened to overturn their small vessel. As his apostles were fighting the storm, and in fear of their very lives, they began to cry “Master, carest thou not that we perish?” The book of Mark recounts that he “arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still.” Upon his divine command, the very elements obeyed his voice and the storm ceased so much that there was a “great calm.”
While this is a powerful display of the divinity of Jesus the Christ, it is also a comforting reminder that He is on the sea with us. He is not standing idly on the shorelines while we fight the storms of life. He is not yelling advice to us from afar. He is with us. Even when we do not believe he is aware, or even interested, in our small vessels, he is our most faithful and determined teammate.
Much of cycling’s rich history comes from France. In the French language, domestique translates as “servant”. In the truest sense, Jesus was, is and will be the greatest domestique in our individual races of life. He came to “lift up the hands that hang down” and strengthen “the feeble knees.” His works and power are all around us. If we do not see him in the immediate, just be faithful. Keep pedaling. He’s probably back at the team vehicle getting something for us to drink.
Steve Bitter is a marketing manager for Bulwark Exterminating in Phoenix, AZ. Originally from Southern California, Steve enjoys cycling, basketball, eating out, movies and watching lots and lots of sports. He graduated with a communications degree from Brigham Young University and spent his internships working for a few professional sports teams. At Bulwark, Steve handles pay-per-click advertsing, social media and public relations for all 11 branches nationwide. If he's not on his bike then you can find him on Twitter. Steve and his wife, Emmy, have 2 kids, Max and Leia.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
2010 Rewind
Best Celebration:
Well my birthday, of course. July 29th marked the day I turned another year older. Not sure how I can top this celebration. I had an amazing time with my friends. We started off with dinner at an Austin favorite, Home Slice Pizza, and then moved the party over to The Highball where we did karaoke in a private party room. Enjoy these pictures, they are classics:
Dinner at Home Slice Pizza:
Karaoke in the "Rappers Delight" room at The Highball:
Best video...ever:
This was no competition, seriously how could you top this video?! It's of my grandma and brother dancing to Tik Tok by Ke$ha at my cousin's wedding. She definitely earned some cool points with this one! :)
(Yes, that is me who is laughing like a hyena. Sometimes I just get caught up in the moment. Don't judge.)
Best Photo:
I feel like this photo captures our sibling relationship quite perfectly.
We can't even have a normal "photo shoot".
Best Concert:
Hillsong United. Hands down. What an amazing experience! Plus, it was fun to worship and spend time with these lovely ladies.
(Photo courtesy of Sara Davis)
Best Memory:
Being apart of one of my best friends wedding. Such a happy, happy day!! :)
Best Read of 2010:
So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore. What a truly convicting read, I honestly don't think of myself the same way anymore. I suggest it to each and every lady out there!
Best Sermon of 2010 at The Austin Stone (in my opinion):
Grace For Sodom and Gomorrah
I highly recommend you listen to this, it continues to wreck me every time.
Well this is my slightly random list of things I really enjoyed in 2010. I hope you had as much fun reflecting on them as I have.
Here's to another great year in 2011!!