Sticks and Stones

I once wrote a blog entry titled "Sticks and Stone May Break My Bones..." I'd like to revisit that post again because it can speak to us on a daily basis. Words hurt, and when the bad words are said at just the right time they can disable a person's confidence and comfort. So here is the blog I wrote when I was going through a time in my life when I had to deal with someone who was verbally abusive (I hate using that word but it's true) and by the grace of God, I have been restored and set free from that situation and I am more than comfortable talking about it. That, my friends, is a perfect example of God's faithfulness.

Sticks and stone may break my bones but words will never hurt me. As children we would close our eyes and say this and it would give us a sense of security. As adults we learn that words do hurt and sticks and stones cause less pain. With every sentence comes a hundred emotions, happy or sad, they cause us to evaluate the person we are. As I walk through the halls of our child care center it is not rare to hear a teacher saying "Use your words." We are taught young to communicate our feelings; it is not until we get older that we can comprehend the pain or joy we bring to others with our words. Some people never see it. They go through life saying what they want because it gives them that sense of security. As "adults" they still close their eyes and say what they feel regardless of the heartache they cause. Some even seek out others to destroy them with their insecurity, but when will it be enough. What will be the standard by which they measure their success? Will it be silence or will it be heartache? When will we learn that the words we say today could possibly echo in someone's eternity...

It is amazing how many aspects of life that entry can relate to, at the time that I wrote that I was dealing with a bad relationship, but now that I am looking back on it I am dealing with people who like to make other people look bad due to their insecurity.

Bear with me as I go on this side tangent that does have to do with this issue.
I grew up in a private Christian school, one that was filled with kids who were blessed with the finer things in life. I experienced a life of "keeping up with the Joneses", everyday was a day that I got to compare myself to my classmates and at the time, it sucked. Don't get me wrong, my family is extremely blessed, we just didn't spend a ridiculous amount of money on luxury vacations and the finest cars. At the time , I couldn't see why my friends thought money was everything, but now I see it's because their parent's thought it was everything as well. I grew up in a sheltered bubble where parents caused just as much drama as the children, and several years later, things have not changed.

As adults we are called to a higher standard. I do realize that I am not a parent, but I believe that they are called to set the bar for their children's behavior. How can you expect a child to be honest and upright if you are anything but. The phrase "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree" didn't come from nowhere.

We are called to be a servant to others, not put down and discourage those who serve. Adults are not immune to insecurities, drama or petty arguments, but that doesn't mean that we have to partake in them. Flee from them, don't worry about what your friends think, after all if they are adults too, shouldn't they understand?? A huge part of me wants to rent an airplane that will "write" in the sky: "Stop using your husband's hard earned money to plot and scheme against others over coffee or pedicures, get out there and serve. If you aren't serving then you have no room to talk. How can your clean hands point fingers at someone who has dirt on their hands to prove their service." I do realize that the first line wouldn't be very Christ-like for me to say, that is why I have refrained from doing so...oh and I don't have several G's to rent a plane, small details. (G's ='s $$$)

So this blog comes at a time in my life when I am frustrated at seeing people hurt people I know with words. Silly, petty words. I have been broken, torn down, and discouraged over a few words and it's not fun. Unfortunately, we live in a world where we don't learn our lesson unless we have experienced it. And though I'd never wish anything like emotional brokenness on someone else, I wish someone people would get slapped with a big dose of reality to see that starting up drama with a few words isn't worth it. It hurts. It causes pain. So until you know what it is like to sacrifice your time to serve your community, you don't get to point fingers at those because you don't think they are doing a good enough job.

So how will your words be used today? To encourage and lift up? Or to break down and destroy?